A Lake Wobegon Christmas



There were no quiet weeks in Lake Wobegon for Pastor Helm
anymore, especially around the Christmas season.  6 Shopping
Days Till Christmas, said the sign in Ralph's Pretty Good
Grocery.  He drove past the Lutheran church where the life-size
nativity scene, with live animals, and furniture hand-crafted in
Bavaria had been up for a couple weeks already.  Farther down
the road, Our Lady of Perpetual Responsibility had its ornate
Christmas tree up, with many colored lights and angels and
whatnot.  Until this year, his little Adventist church hadn't
had to worry about Christmas.  But over the past year his church
had quadrupled in size to 60 members as a result of Net '95. 
Since most of these people had come from other churches in the
town where Christmas was the biggest production of the year,
they obviously had ideas much different than the older members
of the church.  Add this to the fact that the Adventist church
had outgrown its space and was renting the Knights of Columbus
hall and things got interesting in a hurry.



He heard the shouting as he drove up to the hall on Friday
afternoon. He saw Maria Jacobsen's pickup truck and Ingrid
Lutefisk's car parked there already and presumed the worst. 
Then he heard "A pagan tree in the house of God we must not
have!" and he knew the worst.  In her short time in the church
Maria Jacobsen had learned to give as good as she got, though. 
"Just look at that new organ of yours!" she retorted.  "You old
folks worship it like it was a statue.  It's not like anyone can
play it, after all."



It had been a strange year and the new organ had been yet
another unexpected twist.  Ingrid's long-lost aunt had died and
it was discovered that she had bequeathed $40000 to the Lake
Wobegon church to buy a new organ.  Nobody in the church could
actually play it, but Jimmy Larsen had downloaded a few files
from somewhere and managed to get the newfangled computer inside
the organ to play a few hymns.  So far nobody was complaining
about singing "Abide With Me" every week.



Suddenly the phone rang at the hall.  "Collect call from

Melissa Helm," said the operator, and he accepted it.  "Hi,
Daddy," she said.  "Ulrich and I are just at Washington 

National Airport, getting ready to take our flight home.

We'll be into Minneapolis in about 3 hours.  Can you come

and pick us up?  How's everything going?  You say you've got

nobody to play the organ?  Ulrich plays the organ really 

nice.  You say you wanted him to preach at the Christmas

pageant, too?  I'm sure that would be fine.  I'll tell him.

See you!  Bye."   



Pastor Helm breathed a sigh of relief as he hung up the phone. 
The pageant would be so much better now!  And he hadn't had time
to prepare a sermon for the pageant which would be the next

night, so Ulrich preaching was a godsend.  Maria quickly called
him back to attention.  "Pastor, I need your help to bring 

the crib in from the truck."  As they went out to Maria's truck,
they saw Hank LeClair, Maria's brother-in-law, coming to meet
them.  He was the head of the K of C and in charge of the hall.



"I see you're hauling in the nativity scene," he said.  "I
didn't know you Advent folk observed Christmas."  Pastor Helm
knew he shouldn't be embarrassed, after all it was he who had
filled in for the priest last year at the midnight Christmas
mass in the Catholic church.  But Minnesotan restraint led him
to bite his tongue.  Maria was not so restrained.  "You bet we
do," she said.

"We're going to do Christmas up this year in a way that would
make Christ himself proud.  All the kids are going to be part of
the nativity scene. We'll even have some real animals.  You
should come.  It's all tomorrow night."



"Tomorrow night?  That's our lodge meeting for the K of C.  But
don't worry, it won't be any problem at all.  You just come here
tomorrow night and do the program, and our group will come here
and watch, and get the refreshments afterwards.  Heck, I'll even
ask Father Frank to come on down too.  We'll have two kegs of
beer and plenty of extra roast pig to go around." And he got in
his car and drove off.



"I'm scared, Pastor Helm." said Maria.  "All my in-laws are in 

the K of C and they all think Adventists are sort of weird.  Do
you think they'll like seeing a program where there are no
statues or candles or anything?  And what's the hangup with all
these old folks about celebrating Christmas?"



"I don't know about the old folks, Maria, but I know for me that
I like to celebrate Christmas, but not make it too
commercialized.  I think it's become too much of a holiday for
the retailers.  Wait a minute...commercialism...oh my goodness! 
I was supposed to pick up Melissa!  I have no chance to get to
Minneapolis on time now!  What am I going to do?"



And so it was that when Melissa and Ulrich arrived in
Minneapolis, they heard a page "Arriving passenger Melissa Helm
please come to the information desk for a message."  Melissa
rushed to the information desk..."Melissa, I got delayed in Lake
Wobegon.  I haven't actually left yet.  Can you take the shuttle
bus over to the Mall of America and I will come and look for you
there in a few hours.  Thanks, Daddy."



Melissa's eyes sparkled.  "Come on, Ulrich.  Now you are really
going to get to see America.  There is fresh credit-card plastic
in my wallet just waiting for this time."



Ulrich had thought that there couldn't have possibly been any
bigger malls than the ones near Washington, DC, but he was in
for quite a surprise.  Shuttle buses were arriving from the
airport every five minutes as Christmas shoppers galore streamed
into the mall at its peak season of the year.  "How is your
father ever going to find us here?" he asked.



"Relax," she said.  "It's not every couple that's has green and
purple hair.  He'll find us. Now let's find something for you."

And she proceeded to drag poor Ulrich through the fifty mens
stores on the south-east wing of the mall, with him protesting
all the way.  Finally she agreed to stop and rest for a little
while.  "We can go over into the indoor amusement park and 

sit on one of the rides,"  she said.



"What are you going to preach about tomorrow night?" she asked.

"Preach?  On Tuesday night I should preach?  What for?"

"It's the first ever Christmas pageant at the Lake Wobegon SDA
church.  You just need to give a short homily.  Oh, and I said
you would play the organ, too."



"Well, I want to preach about what Christmas should be about. 
It should be a time that instead of getting lots of presents to
people, you give of yourself....Hold it... what did you say
about playing the organ?  You know I haven't played the organ in
years."  Just then they saw a rather tired-looking man searching
the area looking for someone, and Melissa called "Daddy, over
here."



As they were driving home towards Lake Wobegon, Ulrich wondered
what he was getting himself into.  He knew that he would be just
like someone coming from another planet to these people.  What
can I tell them that would make them listen?  What does a
techno-dancing theology student have to say to a bunch of
farmers?  But as they pulled into the town, he saw the large
nativity scene, and he felt better already.



The next day he didn't have much time to practice the organ.  He
would have to go from memory.  But he hoped that by playing loud
and showing off the organ he could also play simply.  He still
wasn't sure about this whole Christmas program and what it was
about, and it looked like everyone else wasn't either.  Just
five minutes before the program now.  Time for a quick noel,
then time to play the Christmas fanfare.  The whole Adventist
church and the whole Knights of Columbus membership, and their
families, were all here by this time.  



At the back he could see the Catholic priest in full regalia,
complete with his altar boys, ready to march in from the back. 
At the side door he could see Maria Jacobsen and Lupita LeClair
preparing to march in the youngsters, with their animals.  Back
in the kitchen he could hear various pots and pans getting
thrown back and forth as Mrs. Lutefisk proceeded to give the K
of C

chef what for on the evils of pork.  He couldn't hear himself
play for all the talking and whatnot.  The little kids were
swarming over the decorations up front.  Then all of a sudden
the spotlights all turned on, and Maria gave him the "Go" sign. 
He began to play the fanfare with might and main.  At the same
time the electric roaster in the kitchen kicked in, and all the
lights went out.  And stayed out.



And Ulrich began to sing...

"Stille Nacht, Helige Nacht

and to his surprise the others started joining in...

"Alles schlaft, einsam wacht

nur das traute hochheilige Paar

Holder Knab in lockigem Haar,

schlaf in Himmlischer Ruh

schlaf in Himmlischer Ruh..."



And then it started up in Spanish...

"Noche de paz, noche de amor..." and so forth



By this time the priest and a few others had found some candles
and lit them, and the room was bathed in beautiful candlelight.

The candlelight revealed a precious group of children, a couple
chickens, a cow, and a donkey.  



Pastor Helm stood up to speak.  "It is easy to lose sight of the
Christ child at Christmas.  But if we search for Him like we
would search for a great treasure...like we would search for our
own daughters at a shopping mall, we shall certainly find.  What
is more, He found us before we wanted to be found.  He searched
for us before we knew we were lost.  Let us celebrate the Christ
who loved us more than we ever knew we needed.  Go in peace, to
serve the Lord.  Amen."



The program was over, and in the light of the candles various
jello molds started to come out, and the smell of mostly-roasted
pig filled the air.  But a quiet calm lingered over the group. 
Some moved over to the piano and started to sing carols.  But in
the darkness over by the organ bench Melissa sat next to Ulrich
and grabbed his hand.  



"I love you" she whispered, and kissed him on the cheek.

"I love you too, Frohliche Weinachten"  he replied.