How the Grinch stole Sabbath

Every Sev down in Sev-land loved Sabbath a lot
But the Grinch, who lived just north of sev-land, did not!
The Grinch hated Sabbath, now please don't ask why.
It sure wasn't because he wasn't forced to try.
It could be his parents rules were too tight.
It could be his academy years weren't just right
But I think that the most likely reason of all
was the fact that his God was two sizes too small.

But whatever the reason, his rules or his God,
He stood there thinking sevland was just too odd.
He stared from his house with a sour grinchy frown
at the warm lighted windows below in their town.
For he knew every sev in the town 'cross the way
was baking a loaf of dry Special K.

And they study their lesson! he snarled with a sneer
Tomorrow is Sabbath!  It's practically here!
Then he growled with his grinch-fingers stroking his beard,
I must try to make Sabbath not quite so wierd!

For tomorrow, he knew, the sevs had a rule,
They'd wake bright and early for Sabbath School.
And then!  the reports! He was so out of sorts!
Investment and Secretary and remote mission forts!

Then the sevs, young and old, would sit down to a feast.
And they'd  feast, and they'd feast
A theological feast!
Cleansing the sanctuary and the mark of the beast
which was something the Grinch couldn't stand in the least!

And THEN they'd do something he liked least of all!
Every sev in sev-land from the tall to the small
Would sit side by side throughout the church service
And they'd sit and they'd sit until kids got nervous
And the pastor would preach, and he'd preach
and he'd preach preach preach preach!
Of work to finish and of souls to reach
and remnant people and school kids to teach
Till the grinch would much rather be at the beach!
And the more the Grinch thought of the sev's worship time
The more he thought "This whole thing is a crime."
Why, for thirty-five years I've put up with it now.
I must stop this Sabbath from coming, but HOW?

Then he got an idea!
An awful idea!
The Grinch got a wonderful, awful idea!

I know just what to do! I'll can win this fight
With this dress I'll look just like Ellen White!
And he chuckled and sneered, "I'll make Sabbath a mess,"
But at least I'm wearing  a nice reform dress.

All I need is a Bible... The Grinch looked around.
But since Bibles are scarce there was none to be found.
Did that stop the young Grinch?  No, the Grinch simply said
"If I can't find a Bible, I'll make one instead!"
So he took his Sears catalog and a piece of old leather,
and with a quick stitch he sewed it together.

THEN
He loaded some rumors and isolated facts
in his "Bible", and prepared his attacks.
With doctrinal club, anti-legalist frown,
he prepared to correct the sevs of the town.

All their windows were dark.  Quiet snow filled the air.
All the sevs were all dreaming sweet dreams without care
When he came to the first little house on the square.
"This is stop number one," the E. Grinch White hissed,
and he crashed in with doctrinal club in his fist.

He had hunting for the distinctives in his mind,
But distinctives are "don'ts" and quite hard to find.
Finally he found them stored in the closet for night.
There's lots of them, he grinned, but at least they're light.
Then in the boardroom he saw the rules in a row.
These rules, he grinned, are the next thing to go!

Then he slithered in a way most vindictive
Around the whole church, taking every distinctive!
Tithing! Footwashing! Large wooden pulpits!
Veggieism!  Baptism!  Scapegoats and culprits!
And he stuffed them in boxes, the old blackheart
and quickly hauled them all out to his cart!

Then he slunk to the icebox.  He took the sev's feast.
He took  Special K loaf and the veggie-roast beast!
He cleaned out that pot-luck according to plan!
The Grinch even took their last Veggie-link can! 
Then he stuffed all the food in the cart, the crook!
"And now, grinned the Grinch, I will haul out the books!"
And the Grinch grabbed the  books, and he started to haul,
when he heard a small sound come from the hall.
He turned and he saw a small sev coming.
Little Bev Sev was happily humming.

The Grinch had been caught by this tiny Sev daughter
who'd got out of bed for a cup of cold water.
She stared at the Grinch and said "Sister White, why?"
"Why are you taking our library?  Why?"
But you know, that young Grinch was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie and he thought it up quick.
"Why, my sweet little tot," the fake Ellen White lied,
Some of my books have errors inside.
So I'm taking them home to my office, my dear.
I'll fix them up there, then I'll bring them back here.

And his fib fooled the child.  Then he patted her head
And he got her a drink and he sent her to bed.
And when little Bev Sev went to bed with her cup
He ran to his cart and packed the books up!

Then the last thing he took was the threat of hell fire
Then he went out the doorway himself, the young liar,
On their walls he left nothing but hooks and some wire.
And the one speck of doctrine he left in the house
Was a crumb even to small for a church mouse.

Then he did the same thing to the other church houses
Leaving crumbs much too small for the other church mouses!

It was a quarter past dawn...
	All the sevs still a-bed, 
	All the sevs still a-snooze
When he packed up the cart.
Packed it up with the books!  The sermons! The reports!
The institutions! and the sev-meat!  The doctrines and forts!
Three thousand feet up!  Up the side of Mount Seven!
He rode with his load thinking this must be heaven!
"A pox on the sev's!" he was Grinchishly humming.
They're just finding out that no Sabbath is coming.
They're just waking up!  I  know just what they'll do!
Their mouths will hang open a minute or two
Then the sevs down in sev-land will all cry "BOO HOO!"

"That's a noise," grinned the Grinch
That I simply MUST hear!"
So he paused.  And the Grinch put his hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.
It started in low.  Then it started to grow...
But the sound wasn't sad!
Why, this sound sounded merry!
It couldn't be so!  But it was merry!  VERY!

He stared down at sev-land!  
The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook!
What he saw was a shocking surprise.
Every sev down in sev-land, the tall and the small
was singing!  With no distinctives at all!
He hadn't stopped Sabbath from coming!
It came!
Somehow or other it came just the same!
And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold snow
Stood puzzling and puzzling:  "How could it be so?"
"It came without remnants!  It came without feasts!"
"It came without sanctuaries, prophecies, or beasts!"
And he puzzled three hours till his puzzler was sore. 
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.
"Maybe Sabbath," he thought, "doesn't come from a book."
"Maybe Sabbath...perhaps...deserves one more look!"

And what happened then? Well, in sev-land they say
That the Grinch's small God grew three sizes that day!
And the minute his God didn't feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light
And he brought back the books!  And the food for the feast!  
And he....

HE HIMSELF

The Grinch taught the mark of the beast!